Why we should start searching for ourselves now and not later


“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” – Aristotle

The Merriam-Webster definition of self discovery is as follows: “the act or process of gaining knowledge or understanding of your abilities, character and feeling.”

If you are anything like me, you probably ask yourself often: “Who am I beyond raising children, making meals, and cleaning the house?” Surely I am not the only mother who has had this thought? If you wonder who you are, where “you” went or where your life is going now is the time to begin your search and I’m going to tell you why.


I am confident that if we find the things we are passionate about as individuals and pursue them we will be much happier people in general. If we are happier women, we will in turn become better wives and better mothers. We need to be the best “me” we can. Essentially as mothers we are the glue that binds our family. Who we are is reflected onto our children. They watch us everyday, they grow everyday and they learn new things everyday.

I have four children ages 10, 5, 2 (almost 3) and 1. They are only getting older and so am I. I want to make sure that from here on out when they look at me they see a person who is happy, confident and content.


The other day my five year old said to me “mommy when I grow up I want to be a stay at home mom like you.” This struck a chord with me. Please understand, there is nothing wrong with US being stay at home moms. However, I have four daughters and I do not want that to be their life goal. We all want the best for our kids. We want to raise doctors, teachers, pilots, poets, artists, nurses and dentists. If our children have the opportunity to stay at home AFTER they establish themselves somewhat in life then that is great.

I’m not sure about you, but I don’t want my girls to look at me and think I am living the dream. I’m not. I don’t even know what my dreams are. To me, that is a problem. We should have dreams, and our children should watch us pursue them. They need to know there is more to “mom” than motherhood. We are setting an example, let’s make it awesome and unforgettable. Let’s teach them things they can carry into their own lives.


Once we begin peeling back our layers, we can learn things about ourselves we never knew. We can establish new values, and they will reflect in our parenting and even our marriage. Once we have some idea of what we want from life and how to start getting it, we can meet new people with similar interests. We may even form lifelong friendships. We will have more fun because we will be more free. Free to be OURSELVES.

I often feel disconnected from myself because I don’t know who I am or what I want beyond the mommy character I portray on a daily basis. I want to find these things out now because I am not getting any younger. This life we live is a short one and before we know it our babies will have babies. Then what? Who are you without them? I want to improve myself now. I want to love myself so I can be the best wife and mother I can be. My family deserves the best me and I intend on giving it now and not later.


10 thoughts on “Why we should start searching for ourselves now and not later

  1. This post really strikes a chord with me. My baby girl is only three months old, but before I had her, I was so busy working, cooking, cleaning and preparing to have her that I didn’t really invest in myself much. I worry that I can’t expect her to have varied hobbies and take part in sports when I don’t. I want to be a more rounded person with a clearer idea of who I am for me and also so that she has a good example to look up to. I want her to think of me as a really interesting person with loads on the go. I’d be devastated if someone asked her when she’s older what Mummy likes and she said ‘cleaning and washing clothes’!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I understand. That is exactly why I started this journey. I am a mother but who else am I? Who do I want to be? How do I want my children to see me as a woman not just as a mother? I’m trying to figure these things out as I go. We are mothers, but we are also so much more. And that is ok!


    1. I completely agree with you! That is why I directed this post to any mothers’ who may feel a bit lost within the duties of motherhood. I love being a stay at home mother, and I feel very blessed to be able to do so. But I also know that there is more to who I am besides “mommy.” I want to explore my passions and talents and be a mother at the same time.😊


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